In Real Life

Love, Lies & Identity in the Digital Age


By Nev Schulman

Read by Nev Schulman

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This item is a preorder. Your payment method will be charged immediately, and the product is expected to ship on or around September 2, 2014. This date is subject to change due to shipping delays beyond our control.

From the host of MTV’s #1 show Catfish comes the definitive guide about how to connect with people authentically in today’s increasingly digital world.

In Real Life:Love, Lies & Identity in the Digital Age

As the host of the wildly popular TV series Catfish which investigates online relationships to determine whether they are based on truth or fiction (spoiler: it’s almost always fiction).

Nev has become the Dr. Drew of online relationships. His clout in this area springs from his own experience with a deceptive online romance, about which he made a critically acclaimed 2010 documentary (also called Catfish). In that film Nev coined the term “catfish” to refer to someone who creates a false online persona to reel someone into a romantic relationship. The meme spread rapidly.

Now Nev brings his expertise to the page, sharing insider secrets about:

-what motivates catfish
-why people fall for catfish
-how you can avoid being deceived
-rules for dating — both online and off
-how to connect authentically with others over the internet
-how to turn an online relationship into a real-life relationship

…and much, much more.

Peppered throughout with Nev’s personal stories, this book delves deeply into the complexities of online identity. Nev shows us how our digital lives are affecting our real lives, and provides essential advice about how we should all be living and loving in the era of social media.


  • "Nev is a great philosopher of the internet and thereby a critical voice for our generation. Whether or not you're a Catfish fan, In Real Life is a must-read and shows us the opportunities and pitfalls that are part of the digital era. Nev makes it plain and simple: the power of the keyboard is now mightier than the sword."
    Matthew Segal, founder of
  • "IN REAL LIFE is so much more than a book about online dating. It's about self-acceptance and being true to yourself in a world where you're influenced by so many people over the internet."
    Jonathan Bennett, host of MTV's Copycat
  • "What I find most exciting about IN REAL LIFE is how it explores the Internet's impact on our perception of gender and sexuality, and how we portray our digital selves to the world to that end. As a fellow millennial, I'm constantly trying to adapt to how the digital age is molding our ideas of love and relationships. In Real Life does not attempt to define these ever-changing terms but instead works to understand them."
    Kim Stolz, author of Unfriending My Ex
  • "Finally someone has written a smart and funny guide that helps young people navigate social media without letting it take over their lives."
    Maude Apatow, actress and twitter personality
  • "Nev's book begins as a fun journey into the world of lying on the internet, but it extrapolates into the larger phenomenon of avatars -- everybody has one on social networks."
    James Franco for Vice magazine
  • "The book is at once a memoir, a meditation on a truly unique phenomenon of the internet age, and a motivational address for anyone seeking virtual companionship. Schulman cautions his readers against lying on their social media profiles, and argues instead for improving "offline" life. "Embrace who you really are, both online and off" is the message at the heart of his book."
    Publishers Weekly

On Sale
Sep 2, 2014
Hachette Audio

Nev Schulman

About the Author

Nev Schulman is the host of MTV’s #1 series, Catfish, which 2.6 million people watch in the U.S., plus millions more worldwide in 25 other countries.

Learn more about this author