The 6 Keys

CHAPTER 1

Which Age Defines You?

I have a question for you: how do you want to age?

I know what you’re thinking. I’ve picked genetic anomalies, wealthy elites, or lifelong athletes—all outliers of epic proportion, right?

Wrong.

It’s never too late, and the things you think are impossible or out of your reach aren’t—not by a long shot. For the first time in human history, thanks to advancements in medical science, we have made incredible discoveries that help us understand not only why and how we age but how to slow and even reverse aging and avoid age-related illness.

There are keys—six to be exact—that collectively open that door, and ways to make those 6 Keys turn, without fail, in the right direction.

Now, these accomplishments aren’t effortless. They require dedication, appreciation, and a profound love for yourself. They require a strong understanding of the science of aging, immunity, longevity, and vitality. They require the courage to make necessary changes—at any age. And perhaps most important, they require an open mind, a shift in thinking, and a new perspective about aging.

But before we dig in to the 6 Keys, just between us, tell me: how old are you? I mean, really.

Sorry, too personal of a question? Okay, I get it, but the whole point here is that it’s nothing to be ashamed of. And in fact, redefining age in your mind will be a pretty critical component to how you age. So, tell me.

In truth, I don’t care about this number. I am actually asking to illustrate a point. Your “age” has many different factors that you are likely not considering, and each dramatically impacts the others to cumulatively affect how you look, feel, and perform over time.

HOW ALL OF YOUR AGES ADD UP

If you’ve been trying to cheat time by focusing strictly on your biological age (through exercise, diet, supplements, creams, etc.), I commend your efforts, but it’s utterly incomplete. The first step in turning that around is understanding that all of your ages—including your emotional, social, and psychological ages—must be considered as a whole in order for your actions to be effective.

For example, you may not think that acting irrationally would age you faster—but it could. Many studies have shown that the higher your emotional intelligence—your ability to recognize and understand emotions in yourself (and others) and to use this awareness to manage your behavior and relationships—the more likely you are to make better decisions, manage anxiety,¹ and be more resilient to stress,² all of which can help you age well.

The same respect should be paid to your social age. Society pretty much dictates exactly when we should be hitting various milestones in our lives. In your late teens, you graduate high school, and by your early twenties, you better be at the start of your career. Between your late twenties and early thirties, you settle down and start building a family. By your forties, if you change careers or do something profoundly stupid, no one bats an eye—you get a free pass because you’re officially in a midlife crisis. Hit your mid-sixties and it’s time to retire. And that’s pretty much the social age rat race in a nutshell.

Nail these markers at the expected times and your social age is right on track. But if you dare deviate, your social age may fall much younger or older than the norm, which could affect you in ways you might not expect. Being a teenage mom, feeling the pressure to be in a serious relationship or on a career track, going back to school in your thirties, or not being financially able to retire are just a few deviations from the norm that could bring on what scientists call “social stress.”

Research³ has shown that social stress may actually interfere with cellular aging and DNA repair, and according to recent data,⁴ where you rank within the social hierarchy could play a major role in how vulnerable you are to chronic stress. Struggling in social settings may also put you at a greater risk for mental and physical health problems,⁵ particularly depression and anxiety—two conditions that make you more vulnerable to accelerated aging⁶ for many reasons, such as lowering your testosterone levels⁷ and impairing white blood cells⁸ (the cells that protect your body from diseases and infections).

Finally, there’s the often disregarded but equally important psychological age. Age can be a self-fulfilling prophecy. What you believe affects your behavior, and how you behave affects your reality. If you believe you’re frail and tired, you’ll stop moving your body in ways that help with bone density, flexibility, mobility, etc.—so you’ll literally become frail and tired. If you feel ineffectual or “outdated,” you’ll stop using your mind in ways that keep it sharp. Simply put: once you accept you’re old—you become old.

Your psychological age affects your body and your mind. New research⁹ from North Carolina State University found that having a positive attitude about aging makes older adults more resilient under stress, while a different study found that having a negative attitude was confirmed¹⁰ to affect physical and cognitive health in later years. To make matters worse, research¹¹ led by the Yale School of Public Health discovered that people with negative beliefs about aging are also more likely to have brain changes associated with Alzheimer’s disease. Simply believing that getting older sucks creates stress that can cause pathological brain changes!

Why do I bring all of this up? Because what you’re about to embark upon with the 6 Keys goes beyond the conventional approach typically explored in most anti-aging programs. You’ll go beyond improving your biological age, because in order to truly change our bodies, we first need to change our minds: the way we think, the things we believe, and subsequently the way we behave. Accepting this reality is the first step.

It is possible to decide how you age. You can have a long, tremendous, spectacular, healthy life—but not without giving yourself over to the aging process mentally and physically. You will need faith. Faith in the science, faith in the strategy, but most important, faith in your ability to believe it and achieve it.

And I’ll tell you this much: if I can do it, you can do it. There is nothing exceptional about me. Don’t get me wrong, I feel capable and worthy of all things great that life has to offer, but I know you are, too. I’m not beautiful like a supermodel, I’m not a genius, I wasn’t born into money, and I have zero special skills or talents.

Now, what I do have working for me is that I had great teachers. Teachers who believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself. Teachers who showed me that I was capable and who gave me the tools and proper information so that when I took action, I got powerful results that helped reinforce my belief in the process, my abilities, and my motivation. And that’s what I’m going to do for you with the 6 Keys.

You picked up this book, so you must believe that I know what I’m doing. You’ve likely seen the results I’ve helped people achieve over the years, and hopefully, you’re looking at me and thinking that I am doing pretty well at forty-four. So, if you believe in me, know that I believe in you, and by this virtuous circle, you ultimately must believe in yourself.

And maybe you think that’s bullsh*t. I’ve never met you, so how can I possibly believe in you? I know it because I know the science. I know that when applied, the results are inevitable. Beyond the hundreds of studies I’ve read, many of which I’ll discuss—I’m living proof. Knowledge is power. It empowers us to make informed decisions and take precise, deliberate actions that yield incredible results.

Yes, it is possible to look your best, feel your best, fend off disease, stay sharp, and be your most robust, fit, and flourishing self for years to come. And soon, you’ll have the keys to making that possibility a reality.

All that said, as mentioned, I make no false promises and offer no magic bullets. These changes will require some work, vulnerability, and sacrifice. Anything worth having always does. And in order to follow through on all those things, you need to have a why. I’m sure you’ve heard me toss this quote out a thousand times, and for good reason: “If you have a why to live for… you can tolerate any how.” The how being the work associated with achieving the goal.

So, I need you to think deeply about why this matters to you. How will your life be positively impacted by the changes you are about to make? And I don’t mean sweeping generalizations like “I’ll look better” or “I’ll feel better.” I mean specifics to which you can form an emotional attachment.

I already know why aging badly isn’t on my agenda. Because I love being on the slopes with my kids, not waiting for them at the bottom of the mountain with hot chocolate.

I love being strong physically because I find it empowers me in all facets of my life and reminds me of my resilience and ability to endure, persevere, and overcome adversity.

I love that professionally I have only continued to grow more successful as I’ve gotten older because I don’t just talk my message—I live it.

I love feeling good about how I have “maintained,” because it gives me confidence in all my interactions.

I love that at forty-four, I am far more fit than I was at thirty-four—or even twenty-four. Because it fills me with hope and positivity for what is yet to come.

I love that I am super comfortable in a two-piece.

I love that I am doing everything in my power to fend off cancer, Alzheimer’s, and heart disease. And even if they do get me, I will have zero regrets around how I tried to avoid it.

I could go on and on and on here… but that is a book unto itself, and this book is about you. So, I’ll stop, as I’m sure you get the idea.

The bottom line is that I know age doesn’t have to be a slow descent into decrepitude. It is possible to age fully empowered with grace, beauty, wisdom, and integrity. I have defied and will continue to defy preconceived notions about aging. I will redefine it on my own terms—physically and psychologically.

So the real question is: how ’bout you?