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Introduction

Hi. It’s me again. Bet you thought we had this “nice girl” thing behind us. I did too. When Nana Twumasi, my publisher at Hachette, first contacted me about doing an updated version of Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office, I wasn’t convinced I should do it. It had been twenty years since the book was originally published and ten years since the release of the tenth anniversary edition. I thought there wasn’t much more to say. So, I asked the women in my LinkedIn network whether they thought women today could benefit from a new and improved Corner Office, and their responses surprised me. In fact, they inspired me. In response to my question about what it was like to currently be a woman in the workplace, I received answers like:

I feel that many of the same issues persist. While there are still instances of sexual advances and mansplaining, these behaviors have become less overt . . . we need updated guidance on identifying and then handling microaggressions, as these may now be less clear.

—Abby C.

It would be interesting to hear more on the changes that someone goes through at different ages, from being a young, early-career pro- fessional to mid-level and late career.

—Alice G.

One thing I struggle with is issues with miscommunication in a remote setting. How do you convey your impact when no one sees you?

—Shanice S.

I find many women hold back on expressing themselves on an impor- tant issue because they don’t want to be labeled with the B word, or told they are acting like men, or told they are being emotional, or are just generally ignored as the men in the room simply move on without consideration of what the woman has said. Those who push through get branded (in uncomplimentary terms), so many just hold their voice.

—Sophie N.

I wish I could share the responses of each and every one who reached out to me because I was convinced about three things: (1) Women just entering the workforce need to hear much of what I’ve written about in the past and the realities of succeeding in today’s workplace; (2) Despite the positive ways in which the workplace has changed for women, we still face considerable challenges that men do not; and (3) There have been significant social shifts since the last edition of this book that impact women at work (the Me Too movement, gender fluidity, the COVID-19 pandemic, dismantling of DEI [diversity, equity, and inclusion] programs, and the erosion of women’s reproductive rights, to name a few). To those who responded to me, I thank you for your encouragement and suggestions and hope this book addresses your concerns and most pressing challenges.

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Once I decided to write this update, I wanted to collect more data. So, I created a survey called Women in the Workplace 2024: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly. I received nearly three hundred responses from women across the globe, including Indonesia, China, Dubai, England, Australia, Hungary, South Africa, and the United States. The ages of the respondents ranged from eighteen to sixty-five and older, and they worked in diverse fields such as consulting, oil and gas, nonprofit community service, law, education, marketing, and manufacturing. An abundance of thanks to the women who participated in the survey. I learned quite a bit from them and from the subjects they spurred me to further investigate.

What I primarily wanted to learn was how the workplace is differ- ent today than it was when Corner Office was first published in 2004. In addition to the anecdotal information provided through the survey, I found some statistics that were, quite frankly, astonishing. Consistently, about two out of every three women who responded believed the work- place was still not equitable in a number of ways. For example, over half the respondents (55 percent) believed some change has taken place but not enough, that there has been no change, or that things have actually gotten worse. In terms of how they felt they were treated, 64 percent said they were usually treated fairly or not fairly treated at all. (Only 37 percent said they were treated fairly almost all of the time.) And when asked how they would compare the opportunities available to them vis-à-vis the men they worked with, 66 percent said men had from a slight edge to a definite edge, with only 33 percent reporting they had the same opportunities. Looking at the responses of women of color, their comments are even more alarming. Only 11 percent reported that their workplace experiences were no different than those of their Caucasian counterparts.

Those of you who encouraged me to write this book were right. When I did a deep dive, I realized our work isn’t done. If anything, we are seeing a disturbing amount of stagnation, backsliding, and resis- tance related to women’s rights. After attacks from the conservative Right, corporate giants like Walmart, Coors, Toyota, Lowe’s, Harley- Davidson, Ford, Microsoft, and others have either eliminated or severely cut back on their DEI initiatives. Donald Trump initiated the elimi- nation of all DEI initiatives and positions in the federal government. Current Secretary of Defense, Pete Hegseth, has made it increasingly difficult for women who serve in the military. And, as you know by now, reproductive rights have been eroded with the overturning of Roe v. Wade, and persistent pay gaps aren’t going anywhere anytime soon. No, our work isn’t done. It is far from done.

Where Do We Go from Here?

In my opinion, you can either be the victim of the challenges that face you or you can meet them head on. I, for one, choose the latter. For those of you who never read any of my other Nice GirlsTM books, you’ll be surprised at how many tools I’m going to provide you with to take control without being controlling. To speak your mind, while still being respectful of others. To be your best self without guilt or shame. You may not opt to adopt every single one of them (there are, after all, hundreds), but choose the ones that will make the biggest difference for you in the short term. Once you have some wins under your belt, go back and take on bigger challenges. The most important thing is to not see yourself as a victim of the system. Every single day you have an array of choices that, when exercised, give you agency and courage. I know from experience that some days we just don’t have the energy to push that pea up the hill one more inch. And on those days, our choice should be self-care that allows us to summon the wherewithal to try again another day.

For those of you who have been following me for the past twenty years or so, thank you. I always love hearing from you and answering your most pressing career questions. Although I’ve included much of the core philosophies from the original book and the tenth anniversary edition, you will find enough new material to make this latest edition a worthwhile read.

One more thing: The main difference you will find between this book and all of my other books is that I’ve finally taken off the kid gloves. I’ve always said that I’m a recovering nice girl, so in past books, I tried to be tactful and diplomatic—sometimes to the exclusion of expressing the full extent of what I really think or believe. Well, as Kathy Bates said in the movie Fried Green Tomatoes in response to being harassed by a group of young women, “Face it, girls, I’m older and have more insurance.” I feel a little like that. I’m definitely older, and I have enough insurance to double down on what I see as the behaviors that impede workplace success. You will find my candor increases exponentially in this book. I have less time in front of me to facilitate change for women, and I’m not going to waste one minute of it.

A NICE GIRLS Book

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