Dear Every Breath All Entries Page 9

Cancer has a way of making one look back at life. The one person who I wished was here with me thru this journey has been gone for years and only comes to me in my dreams. The one that is still alive has not taken time from work to be physically with me during all these difficult treatments. Phone calls and cards are nice but I don't know how to tell him how special it would be to actually feel a hug.I go to my treatments alone and some days I question how I can keep going thru these treatments.I push myself to keep going. But it is so hard. People do not see my struggle inside me.

Upon first viewing, I fell in love. Blessed with its own Aspen thicket, My sanctuary is named ASPEN HOLLOW. Every day for a month, I have eagerly awaited A hint of Spring's green. Numerous Aspen in the draw, Extending easterly, have died, In my four-year absence. A loss felt deep in my soul. Tears burning my eyes, Distressing my return home. Now I must cull the dead, Prepare for cremation, And thence scatter their ashes. Yet, to my delight, I witness, The emergence of abundant leaflets. The perseverance of life. 5/21/08

When I was in high school I dated probably 20 different girls. My buddy and I would trade dates from one week to another. Then after I had graduated, in July I dated a girl still a sophomore in high school. I knew then that she was the one. We went together for 4 years and then while I was in the Navy we were married. We had 3 children, 4 grandchildren and 4 great grandchildren. We will celebrate our 64th wedding anniversary this December. We weren't too young as were what some people said. We have had our challenges but with God watching over us we are still in love and life is happiness.

My mom died last summer, and her passing took my breath away. I loved her deeply, took care of her for many years, and saw her through the agonizing physical and mental changes of Alzheimer's disease. She beat breast cancer twice to be slain by the same horrifying killer that took her younger sister years earlier and now has her older sister in its hands. May you never have to face this terrifying disease, but if you do, please remember that Alzheimer's patients need you desperately. They need to be treated with love, kindness, patience, routine, simple things like a light room. They need you.

I felt lost and hopeless I let my thoughts go to unwanted places. I felt scared, worried,and lonely. BUT Time is magical, and just at the right moment in my life their comes a light known as a special soul person, that person came in my life not knowing my story or who I am. But with touching words, it helped me break down my fear. He became a shining light where once I thought I was in the dark. And i am thankful for it. The world is huge but yet sometimes turns out to be so small, He seemed so far but yet so close. Time has its own course,today I can say I am thankful.

My cousin is in N.C. for the week. Tomorrow she will be scattering the ashes of her beautiful, 28 year old daughter that died of ovarian cancer on September 28th. Please pray for their family and Kaitlyn's husband Tim.

I am sorry for everything. We were meant to be but we met each other at the wrong time and age. I wish I could turn back time, I wish I could have you by my side. It´s still weird that everytime something really good or really bad happens to me, all I can think is "I have to tell him" but then I remember that we don´t talk anymore. I will forever miss and love you and I wish you nothing but the best, even when you broke my heart in a thousand pieces. Forever grateful, x.

March 2017, he tried to commit suicide. He didn't have a cell. All I had was Facebook messenger and he wasn't replying. I couldn't breathe. I was hurting so bad. Please I begged him, please go to the hospital, get help. I didn't know until the next morning that he saw my messages, he listened and was in the hospital. He was alive and he was going to be ok. My plea for him to not leave me were answered. He sought help to get off the drugs that had taken over him. He was better, clean, sober for over 1 year. Then a car accident took him from me June 2018. I'm lost without my best friend. I <3 u!

Life has a funny way of bringing two people together and two people apart. If you would have told me when I was 19 that he wasn't the one for me, I would not have believed you. Everything about him consumed me; his looks, his touch, his kiss, those eyes. After having our first daughter together, I knew he was my soulmate but as time passed, I constantly questioned if I just started too young. Sometimes things fall apart so better things can fall together and that's exactly where I am now. Somewhere better.

After 34 years I finally found the love of my life and one day we will get married and spend the rest of our lives together.He works very hard and tries to make me happy as often as he can and also tries to make my son happy as well.My parents love him especially my dad and hopefully soon we will be getting a house with 40 acres of land soon!!!

I think I finally found someone who makes me happy. We share the same interests, finish each other’s sentences. I feel Ken completes me! I hope he feels the same. Been waiting to hear those 3 words ( I love you). I know they will come. I am newly divorced. Ken is in the process. Feeling all the emotions, & pain , it’s no wonder why neither of us say those 3 words to each other. Ken, you ARE my soulmate & I do love you. I will wait for you. Love you, Nancy

Years ago I was young and in love and I made a decision that would change my life forever. Not a day goes by that I don't think of those special times. The ache inside never goes away. I have carried this with me thru my life and I don't talk about it with anyone. I will always wonder what my life could have been like if I had made a different decision. Love in South Carolina.

I was at the Kindred Spirit mailbox this past August. I sat on the bench, admiring the view while writing in the book. I had so much that I wanted to write but my husband was getting impatient. We were so lucky to have another person take a picture of us next to the mailbox! I can only wish that my parents could have been able to visit the beach with us. My Dad probably wouldn’t have enjoyed it as much as my Mom but just for a chance to sit on the beach with them would have been enough for me. I miss them so much each and every day. But then I think that they have the best view, from Heaven...

Never heard of Kindred Spirit mailbox until I read EVERY BREATH. What a wonderful idea! If mankind shared their feelings with words instead of guns, fists, bad language and threats, the world would be in a better place. Thank you Mr Sparks for spreading the idea when including it in your book. I am planning a visit to Kindred Spirit next month, hopefully it still stands after Hurricane Florence.

yes that is what I always called you. You were & will always be the love of my life. You always made me feel I deserve to be loved unconditionally. You will always be my world, my life. As I held your hand, told you I loved you and I would be ok when you took your last breath. 18 months later I miss you and I am not ok. my children, grandchildren and friends have all been there for me. I wish I could say the same for your children. I have learned a hard lesson about people that act like they are your friends until you need them. I love you Pa and miss you more than anyone knows

Today is your birthday and I miss you. You left us in 2001 to go to your forever home in Heaven. I remember that day so clearly, as I sat by your beside watching you slip peacefully from this life into eternity with our Savior. I am so grateful to have been there. Some days the pain of missing you is not as great, but today, especially today, it is. You were a wonderful father and grandfather. What joy it gave me to watch you play with my son. You were such a blessing to us. You were my hero and my champion, my cheerleader and my rock. I love you Dad and I miss you.

I often think of you, my dear friend. We had a time of friendship and a moment of love. You chose another in the end. I always thought I’d see you again somewhere down the road. Have a chance to talk to you, touch you. Then, the war got the best of you. When I got word that you were gone I couldn’t believe it. You were still so young. I heard you became a shell of the man you once were. Your laughter and humor died long before you did. You were overrun by your depression and left this world by your own hand. Now what is left are photos and memories and the hope of next lifetime.

We met in a make-believe land and formed a real-life bond I thought would never break. We never lived in the same city or even went to the same school, but we were friends. Great friends. This-dress-doesn't-fit-me-but-I'll-stand-up-in-your-wedding-anyway kind of friends. You asked, more than once, what caused our friendship's demise. I wouldn't answer you. I couldn't. I didn't have the heart to tell you the truth, and now the reasons seem so petty, I couldn't possibly. Maybe someday I will. Know you're still in my heart and I think of you often. And, I'm sorry.

The truth of the matter is, I like you. I really do. What you do with this truth is up to you. I don’t expect anything from you, nor do I want you to feel like you have to do something now that I’ve told you this. You see me as a friend, that’s fine, I see you as a friend too, I even like you as a friend me telling you how I feel about you, is me being honest with myself and with my feelings instead of trying to deny them or suppress them because then they just get in the way of everything so it’s better to deal with them upfront, so I know what I’m getting myself into. 

We had known each other for years and lost contact. Then in the late summer of 2012 we found each other in the grocery store of all places. We always said someone placed us there that day. That meeting set the stage for the wonderful life we shared for 2 beautiful years. And then in the blink of an eye you were gone. I went to bed one night my world was perfect and in the morning it was in shambles. How the accident happened and why I will never understand. But to this day I still love you and miss you more than anything. 2012 to 2014 we shared more love than I ever thought possible.