Use code DAD23 for 20% off + Free shipping on $45+ Shop Now!
Revenge of the Lunch Ladies
The Hilarious Book of School Poetry
By Kenn Nesbitt
Illustrated by Mike Gordon
Illustrated by Carl Gordon
Formats and Prices
- Trade Paperback $8.99 $11.99 CAD
- ebook $7.99 $9.99 CAD
This item is a preorder. Your payment method will be charged immediately, and the product is expected to ship on or around July 10, 2007. This date is subject to change due to shipping delays beyond our control.
Also available from:
Revenge of the Lunch Ladies is sure to keep the laughs coming with each giggle-packed page. Kenn Nesbitt has created forty-five silly poems and songs all about school. Following the success of When the Teacher Isn’t Looking, this book combines Nesbitt’s talent and sense of humor to deliver a knee-slapping collection. If silly principals and crazy lunch ladies don’t have you laughing, a science project that ate the student’s dog will!
For Isabella and Cooper
Welcome Back to School
“Dear students, the summer has ended.
The school year at last has begun.
But this year is totally different.
I promise we’ll only have fun.
“We won’t study any mathematics,
and recess will last all day long.
Instead of the Pledge of Allegiance,
we’ll belt out a rock ’n’ roll song.
“We’ll only play games in the classroom.
You’re welcome to bring in your toys.
It’s okay to run in the hallways.
It’s great if you make lots of noise.
“For homework, you’ll play your Nintendo.
You’ll have to watch lots of TV.
For field trips we’ll go to the movies
and get lots of candy for free.
“The lunchroom will only serve chocolate
and Triple-Fudge Sundaes Supreme.”
Yes, that’s what I heard from my teacher
before I woke up from my dream.
Water bottle, too.
Presents for my friends.
one for every shape.
need to buy.
I never knew a
shopping list could
make my mother cry.
My Dream of School Supplies
I had a dream of school supplies,
where paper clips could talk,
where poster paper hung around
with marking pens and chalk.
The stationery idled
while the pencils madly raced.
The clocks went ’round in circles,
and the glue sticks merely paced.
The binders were inseparable.
They bonded with the tape.
The workbooks exercised and helped
the stencils stay in shape.
Some calculators added
to the numbers in this land,
and music was provided by
a singing rubber band.
These things were weird and kind of cool,
but this was even cooler:
The dictionaries all looked up
to me—I was the ruler.
My New School
You won’t believe the crazy things
I’m learning how to do.
I’m learning how to juggle,
ride a unicycle, too.
I now know how to twist balloons
in many different shapes
and how to make a costume
out of multicolored drapes.
I’ve learned to run in floppy shoes
and how to dye my hair.
I’ve even learned the graceful art
of dancing with a bear.
For when we moved, my parents looked
at many different towns,
but chose a place with just one school:
a school for circus clowns.
Robots in the School
We had never seen a robot
till they commandeered our school.
They arrived here from the future
when they needed to refuel.
They invaded every classroom.
They came clanking through the halls.
If you looked inside the bathrooms,
you’d see robots in the stalls.
They surrounded all the teachers
and propelled them out the door.
Then they headed for the offices
in search of even more.
They ejected the custodian
and principal as well,
plus the secretary, nurse,
and all the other personnel.
They intruded in the lunchroom
and evicted all the cooks.
They expelled our good librarian
and plundered all her books.
Then they came across a small surprise
in section eight-one-one—
just a book of goofy poetry
that looked like lots of fun.
When they opened it and read
about some silly school supplies,
their antennae started sparking
as they snickered in surprise.
Then a poem that they read
about the students’ favorite sports
- On Sale
- Jul 10, 2007
- Page Count
- 80 pages
- Running Press